Eating Dolphins & Poll # 2 — What Would You Eat??

The other night, in case you were unaware, was the Academy Awards.  That’s just another pat-ourselves-on-the-back, Hollywood bullshit fest in general, but it does give us some insight.  The award winners in each category are not based on statistics, but rather the Academy members’ collective opinions.  While the film that makes the most money doesn’t get an award, sometimes a ground-breaking movie with relatively little known actors, that didn’t make a ton of money, gets an award.

Yeah, they love to glorify each other, but once in a while, they have some class, too.  But what’s more is that because the votes are a result of Academy members’ opinions, and Academy members are most certainly a part of pop culture (every one of them, to some degree), it would be fair to say that the Academy Awards are a pretty decent reflection of current popular opinion in Hollywood, if not the entire country.

This past weekend a movie called “The Cove” won a statue for Best Feature Documentary.  The subject of this film is basically the fishing practices of the indigenous people of Taiji, Wakayama,  Japan.   They practice a fishing technique called dolphin drive hunting in which bottle nose dolphins are cornered into an inescapable inlet and then attacked with spears and knives, dragged ashore, and killed for meat and lard.

While I think it is fairly obvious that I don’t approve of these practices, it raises several intriguing questions.  There are so many lines to be drawn between what is and what is not acceptable in these practices, but I’m focusing on just one.  What is it that Westerners, and really, most of the world, find despicable in killing and eating dolphins?

Rightly so, the leaders of this community either refuse to comment on the recent publicity and controversy surrounding their culture or they shoot right back.  While they kill dolphins with their bare hands and hunting skills, America raises, tortures, slaughters and gets fat (financially and physically) on a lifetime of animal abuse for the convenience of a dollar double cheese burger.

It has been their culture for 400 years to corner the local dolphins, kill them and eat them.  Never mind that it is gruesome.  Now that this movie has gotten an Academy Award, many will watch and shun the Japanese culture and their mistreatment of innocent animals.  There are many documented accounts of a much higher degree of disgusting treatment withing our own borders, but those movies don’t win awards.  I don’t wonder why.

So, is it that dolphins are smart??  That they look  kind of cute?  Pigs are just as smart as dolphins.  They have been know to use tools, to be easily trained, and are estimated to have the intelligence of a 3 year old human child.  But shit… this country love bacon.

Some things on the farm get to live, and some get to be dinner.  The cow, chicken, and pig…they’re dinner.  But for some reason, the horse, mule, donkey, dog and barn cats get to live.  Why??  Okay, maybe the cats don’t offer that much meat.   Maybe the horse is just too damn muscular to be tender.  But why don’t we force feed the cats corn for three months, fill them with steroids and fatten them up for a snack?  Why don’t we cage young horses in dark rooms and starve them so their muscles don’t have the opportunity to develop, and make them delicious?

So, I present to you the “What Would You Eat” Poll.  I’m not talking about what extent you would be willing to go in a catastrophe.  I’m not talking about what you would be willing to eat on a dare, or for money, or in a foreign country while visiting.  I’m asking what you would eat if it was considered normal, everyday food in America.  Is what we eat really a direct result of what is culturally acceptable??  Do we only find flavor in things we don’t consider pets??  It’s a truly anonymous poll, so answer truthfully and marvel at the results.  The answers are randomly ordered and you can check as many as you like, or add your own.


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